Inspiration from the Doctor

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

Dr. Seuss

It’s a quote you’ve probably all heard before, and it’s one that has had a profound impact on my life. I’ve recently learned that I really don’t care what people think of me. Or rather, I’d like to not care. I’ve decided that I officially am not concerned with the opinions of strangers. Family and friends, however, are another story. It took a lot of work and painful humiliation to get this far, and I’m sure it will take an incredibly bigger effort to get all the way, but I’m proud that I can actually say that I do not care what random people think about me.

It was a messy transformation, but I have changed from someone who was constantly worried about what others thought of me. It involved learning how to set boundaries, finding my voice, and figuring out a little more about who I am. You see, I had to have some things that I was proud of in my life before I could accept that it doesn’t matter if everyone else likes me. And you know what? I’m happier for it. Now, if I get dressed up, I’m doing it for me, not to look good to strangers. I feel infinitely “lighter” realising this. The next step is to let go of the opinions of those closest to me.

lessons from childhood (and dr seuss)

When I was younger...

i believed my father was a superhero

i believed it when i was told i could be anything i wanted to be.

i tried anything despite not being qualified - that word had no meaning to me. if i tried something and failed it just meant i would get to try it again.

i was fearless -- we're talking roller skating down a hill that could rival some of those in San Fran

i didn't think about my body in any way other than that it was what let me do cool things

fear foods were foods that looked gray and splumped onto the cafeteria tray

i thought my mother was beautiful not in spite of her differences, but because her differences were what made her my mom

i knew the power of friendship and trusted it wholly

weight was wait -- and its only association was when you had to wait your turn

i believed in sharing and caring

all of life's problems could be solved by reading a Sweet Valley book

rainbow brite protected me in my sleep in the form of a blanket and when i was scared helped me feel secure by being wrapped tightly around me

feelings weren't right or wrong - i just felt and it was okay to do so

i would get excited to hear the ice cream truck

i was addicted to the game candyland and the idea of that forever happy place that existed even if my house was not happy -- it gave me a sense that there was someplace happy in the world- someplace good where people were truly good - i consequently felt that hope could be found in a board game --- or in anything

dr. seuss taught me that "unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing's going to get better it's not,"  that I would succeed (98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.), and that “sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple" which would help me ask the right questions to get to the honest answer.

the world was my playground and it was my job to explore it - finding things other people were too busy to see and overlooked- "You’ll miss the best things if you keep your eyes shut."

i neglected grammar and believed putting a heart next to my name made any apology letter better

i thought that hugging was giving another person a piece of you -- the harder you hugged the more you loved them

i listened to my body cues. when i was hungry i ate. when i was tired i slept.

i knew that exercise was meant to be fun

i believed wishes were magic and that it was possible for dandelion seeds to carry dreams and wishes away

i believed that dandelions were flowers too

i got excited at the simple things like discovering the goldfish cracker character has a name (it's finn and his girlfriend is Brooke --- oh wait, that may have been my adult self...)

i was mindful -- very much aware of that moment in time. if i was there with you - i was there with you rather than thinking of something else. if i were playing soccer, i was focusing on that.

i dreamed of the day when i could grow up and eat dessert every night like my father who would have a pb&j sandwich and a bowl of ice cream every night before bed, but after doing a couple of sets of one armed push ups.

i believed in promises and trusted people

my dinner plate was colorful... and i ate bread which obviously didn't kill me

and probably most importantly... i loved myself... i didn't know how not to

oh what my younger self could teach me...

what could your younger self teach you??

p.s... major hugs and well wishes to Ashley (she knows why)

Who Am I Without My Eating Disorder?

Whether you’ve existed with your eating disorder for many, many years or just a few months, it can become your identity; it’s all you know. And maybe it’s also all others have known too. You and your eating disorder, your eating disorder and you. So, when you’ve made the decision to recover, the question that is often asked is ‘Who am I without my eating disorder?’…

I know it is something that often crosses my thoughts. And I’ve been giving it a considerable amount of thought of late. It can be very daunting and scary.


And of course, I don’t know the answer yet as to exactly how I will be once recovered but I do know that I am not my eating disorder. I am loving. I am caring. I am talented. I am giving. I am creative. I am loyal. I am strong. I am Hanna.

And as for how life will be? Well, anything is better than life as it has been. I cannot see into the future but I know it will be brighter. It will be happier. It will be healthier. There will be laughter, healing, fun and success- in every sense of the word. There will be love and there will be light.

Can you relate to this?

Ask yourself this; who do you want to be? You see, I believe when you are free from your eating disorder; you can be anyone you want to be! And that is exciting. Scary? Yes but invigorating too!

You don’t have to ‘be anything’ you don’t want to be. You are you and you are beautiful. You do not have to conform to any ones idea of who you were before your eating disorder or who they expect you will be. The beauty of any kind of healing is self-growth and discovery.

Many may ‘cling’ to their eating disorder through fear of finding the ‘real them’; don’t let that be you. Broaden your horizons, explore, enjoy, spread your wings and fly. Take each day as it comes and find time to get to know yourself again.

The relationship we have with ourselves is the most important one we shall ever form. Treasure it.

So who are we without our eating disorders? You are you and I am me and we are amazing; just as we are.

I leave you with a video that someone sent to me once. Beautiful song, powerfully written & inspiring. I’ve also included a couple of quotes by Dr Seuss , the American children’s writer cartoonist & all round fab guy :o)

With Much Love, Smiles & Support

Hanna x




Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you~ Dr Seuss

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those that matter don’t mind ~ Dr Seuss