That Moment....

That moment when you’re staring at a restaurant menu; your hands are clammy, your heart pounding, your mind is racing.

You are terrified.

That moment when you feel awkward, like all eyes are on you as you desperately try to figure out what would be the ‘safest’ thing to order.

But it’s all so daunting.

That moment when your eyes are drawn to foods you’d really like, you know would taste yummy and  yet that little voice is telling you-

“No, you mustn’t have this, you can’t have that, have you any idea what’s in that!!”

It’s exhausting, it’s painful and it’s miserable.

That moment when the waitress comes to take the tables order and you take the longest, scared of what you may order. What if you slip up and actually order what you want???!!!

When you finally speak you don’t order what you want, what you fancy.

That moment when suddenly, you’re angry!

And you want some answers!

Why did you order that? Do you really want to eat it? Did it tickle your taste buds? Will you enjoy it? Why are you so afraid of a menu, of your own hunger? Why is it that others can order x but not you? Why should you not be allowed to eat what you want?

And what’s stopping you?

That moment when, before you know it, you’re racing to find a waitress. You find yourself asking if it’s too late to change your order?

You’ve changed your mind.

That moment when the food arrives and your table think they’ve brought you the wrong food but you turn to them and say;

“No, I’ve got exactly what I wanted”

And you eat it.  

And you enjoy every last bite.

That Moment is called Recovery

~

Adapted from something I wrote after an experience at the weekended.

What do you want today?

Happy Pancake Day!!

With Much Love, Smiles & Support, 

Hanna xx