I found out my grandfather was in hospice this past Saturday due to an accident and he passed away late Sunday night... Consequently, I haven't had words for awhile now.
I saw Laura on Monday, as she offered to let me see her off-schedule, and during her session I realized I couldn't even pinpoint my feelings... and sitting here right now, I'm not certain I can either. When I fill out my DBT diary cards.. that last section is often always empty - except for the occasional, "tired" or something similar. Laura wound up sending me the link to a website with lists of emotions... RIGHT HERE
Little did Laura realize (or maybe she did), but this was actually a topic of a recent DBT group... we were given a sheet that gave a lot of different emotions (sadness, fear, happiness, etc) and stated their purpose.
"Sadness is a healthy response to loss that signals a need to be consoled, and leads us, if we heed it, to seek comfort from another person.
Anger is a healthy response to betrayal or violation, and leads to setting boundaries.
Fear is a healthy response to threat, and signals a need to escape danger, and can guide us to run or to engage in appropriate safety behaviors."
Seeing all of these emotions in list form on that website was an interesting experience.... because I realized some of the words I could sort of remember feeling like at some point in the past, but couldn't recall the "when." I imagine (since this is often present in DBT) that a part of being able to do this is, or start to, relates to mindfulness.
Emotions are a key part of being human. Having this ability to feel. Definitely something to work on getting back.