Fear is an absolutely terrible emotion to feel. It can grip you right to your very core. I should know, I have spent the best part of this past year living either with it, in it or surrounded by it (mainly others fear for me)
But can fear actually hurt you? Well technically no, it can’t. Physically. But it can deeply affect you and hurt you emotionally and spiritually. And it can stop you doing just about anything.
I use the term fear in relation to food and the feelings that come with it. Fear of eating it or not eating it. Fear of eating too much or too little. Fear of what others may think whist you’re not/and or are eating it. An extreme fear of food itself.
Sounds pretty complicated right? Fear is. And dominating too.
Prime example of fear dominating me today- I went to a café for a coffee this morning and they had some amazing muffins on offer so I got one to take out- A whole-wheat banana and chocolate one. But my fear of actually eating a muffin has prevented me from ‘allowing’ myself this beautiful muffin. It sits in my cupboard now.
The fact of the matter is there is absolutely nothing physically stopping me from eating that muffin right now. I could get up, walk to the kitchen, take the glorious food from the dark and lonely cupboard, bring it back with me and sit down and eat it. Even enjoy it! I’ve done this recently with other foods so what’s so different about this muffin?
So, how do we face our fears and conquer them?
I’ve found challenging my thoughts around the fear and trying to look at them logically can be extremely helpful. Asking myself “what is stopping me?” “What would happen to me if I did x, y or z?” “Would I benefit/feel fulfilled/be happier/ doing x, y or z?” “Have I done this before and how did I feel when I did?”
Also, try looking at things from another’s perspective. What would they see or do looking in? Would you deny a friend what you fear doing?. What advice would you offer them? Can you honor yourself and give the same?
Reach out and call somebody (or in this day and age text/email/ping/poke!) Tell them what’s going on. Be honest about your fear. Let them help you. Ask them to do it with you.
Also, actually biting the bullet and just doing it, as scary as this may be can normally be the most rewarding! And extremely liberating. With each bite, it does get easier.
Dare to do what you want to do. Trust yourself and listen to what you want and need. You’ll thank yourself for it.
And so it’s now 1:40am here and time for me to go to bed. But in the morning I will not have forgotten about that poor little muffin. And you know what? I am going to try and push through my fear. Life is too short to deny myself something so good and yummy.
But you know what? If I don’t manage to eat the muffin, I am not going to beat myself up about it either. Because life is also too short to treat yourself badly!
And I can honestly hold my head high and say that I have looked fear in the face and challenged it many a times lately. And that felt amazing!
And you can too!
With Much Love, Smiles & Support,
‘Feel the fear and do it anyway!’ ~ Susan Jeffers