There’s No Such Thing As ‘Living’ With An Eating Disorder… (Guest Post)

Just merely existing….

And unfortunately I’m one of the many who have personally experienced this. Or maybe not so unfortunate after all?

Let me explain… And introduce myself. My name's Hanna and I have been floating through life battling my eating disorder for the past 16 years. I’m still only 24 years old- that’s nearly half of my life that has been consumed by this.

Over the past 6 months, my eating disorder grew more & more powerful and I was admitted to hospital for treatment. Although now discharged, I am still struggling. But I have made a commitment to myself and to others to beat this once and for all. I came to realise that by finally facing my own demons I could begin to help others face theirs too. That we can take our own experiences in life, both the good and the bad & use them to heal others and ourselves. To not only educate but to liberate.

I don’t go through life thinking ‘why me?’ or full of regret. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t wish this illness upon anyone but I cannot change what has been. I can only focus on the here and now, & I truly believe that those who are, & have suffered, share a unique ability to be able to share their experiences, along with the strength & courage it takes to make the choice to recover & then the steps to actually do it.

I have met so many amazing & beautiful men and women along the path to recovery, so many that are in the depths of their eating disorder yet still supporting others as much as they can. And there are those who have recovered and are now living free and inspirational lives.

It takes a lot to find the courage; strength and determination within you to fight an eating disorder and it come sometimes feel much easier to just ‘keep going’. Recovery isn’t meant to be easy or comfortable, but with friendship, support and utter self-belief anyone can find happiness & health, escape from existing, & in to living a beautiful, colourful & wonderful life. A life full of endless opportunities.

There are of course times when it just seems too hard, that there is just too much to do, it’s too painful. And of course it’s at times like these that we have to truly find that fighting spirit within ourselves and reach out for help. To realise that we are not alone.

I am proud to be apart of a community of amazing people who know how to bite back! And it’s an honour to be a part of this blog too.

From courage we find strength, from strength we find freedom & ultimately from freedom we find love. Love for ourselves, love for others & love for life…

I wouldn’t change who I am. Never change who you are too.

With Much Love & Hugs, & a photo I hope fills you with hope too.

Hanna x